Bed Sheets and Kitchen Towels

Right before Christmas, Kent and I went to the Clackamas Town Center to peruse the stores for bargains for Christmas gifts. And of course go to Build A Bear Workshop for Kayte...(It's a yearly "tradition" for her to get a new BABW for Christmas.) I say this with a smirk...not only because we have done it probably 3 years in a row...but also because at a certain persons house (I am not mentioning names) there is always one "tradition" or another being started...For instance, going to the movies on Christmas Eve of every year. Well..yeah...that would be a great "tradition" if it were to happen EVERY year...but it hasn't...so I don't know how it can actually be a tradition. And if they do something new that year...then it becomes a "tradition" but never gets followed up with the next year. But I digress...

Anyways, so here Kent and I and Kayte are shopping with all of the other cabin fevered folks. After BABW...we go upstairs to search for gifts...and come upon this small store front saying 500 thread count sheets for only $30.00. Or, 2 for $50.00!! WHAT?? Are you serious?? So of course we go in and feel the "pillow case" that they have out, so that in fact you can see just how soft these sheets are. We talk to the guy and ask him why and how he can sell these awesome sheets for so little and he tells us that he used to work for the manufacturer of said sheets, and there was a middle man involved somewhere...but now he just buys from the manufacturer directly, thus offering us these great sheets at a real steal!! Now mind you, if you were buying queen, you had 2 colors to choose from and 2 colors only...well, we have a king size bed...so do you offer the same deal as the queen? And he said yes...but only in the 2 colors. So, we contemplate these 2 colors, wondering if they compliment each other enough so that we can put a top with the other bottom and interchange the pillow cases. Well, he asks what colors would we really be interested in as he has another color (the sea green color) that he can offer to us. So, we choose the chocolate brown sheets, and the sea green color. Fair enough...we buy our sheets for $50.00 and we forge on ahead looking for just the right Christmas presents.

.....That night, I take the brown sheets out of the package to put in the washer. Holy cow...are sheets supposed to smell like a blanket straight from Mexico? Oh well, into the washer they go. They get to washing...and then go into the dryer where I think they are in there all of a half a second and they are done!! Now onto the fun part...making the bed!! (Note to all: I LOVE CLEAN SHEETS ON MY BED...AND WOULD CHANGE THEM EVERYDAY IF I COULD...) So, we make the bed...and it's time for bed. We crawl in (nekked, of course) and feel like we got the bargain of a lifetime!! Not only did we get 2 (count em...TWO) sheet sets...but they also came with 4 (count em..FOUR) pillow cases EACH!!

....Fast forward to the next week, when I change the sheets to the other color. All is good...till about 4 days later and I feel down where my feet go...and my bottom sheet is pilled. WTH (What The Hell?) I can't sleep with pilly sheets!! SHEESH!! So I change the sheets yet again...and well, a week later, I kind of forget about the pilling, and I put the freshly washed sea green sheets back on the bed. Later that night...Kent gets into bed and he says..."Ah...you changed the sheets...these feel good." Then a little while later..."Did you flip the sheets up to the top? Cause right where I lay, it's pilled where your feet were!!" Ummm...Oops...I forgot!!

So, to make a long story {{short}}...I think we got taken on these blasted blankety blank sheets!! There is NO way that they are 500 TC sheets!! And when you put them on your bed...You should see all of the little runs there are in said sheets. CRIPES!! You would think we had a darned cat or something clawing at the sheets...but..umm..nope. It's just the freaking awesome (said with all the sarcasm I could muster) sheets!! HARUMPH!! See if I buy sheets from a "dealer" again!! NOUGH SAID!!
*I didn't even get to my part about kitchen towels...that will have to go into another post!!

A beautiful day if I ever saw one!!

Yesterday (Sunday) we woke up to a dusting of snow here in Portland. And by 4pm...it was totally gone.
Today, the sky is a majestic blue...and not a cloud in the sky. However, it looks cold...so I don't think I will venture outside today.

I have a to-do list...wanna hear it?

#1- Laundry...I make it disappear, and like magic...it just reappears out of nowhere!! I swear, I should be a magician!! I think the headlines would read something like this..."This week only...(not really...it's every week of my life...) Andrea will make the laundry disappear...and it will instantly reappear!! Ta-Da!!" And BAM! There it is again. Blink...and it reappears!! Honestly, one would think we have 15 people living in this house for all the laundry we have. Nope...not 15...just 5...and a million dish towels!!

#2- Clean the bathroom...(Mine...not the kids...cause I don't wanna!!) How is it that I can clean the bathroom on Monday, and by the following Monday, the dust is thick upon the tile again? The hair bunnies are creeping under the cabinet...waiting to brush upon my uncovered foot at any moment?? I mean seriously...a week!! It's not like it's been 5 months since I have cleaned the bathroom...sheesh!! I wish the hair bunnies would go visit someone else's house...

#3-Think about Vacumming. Hmm...that's just what I will do to...THINK ABOUT IT!! :)

#4- Look up recipes for French Bread. (I made bread the other day...silly me...forgot to grease the baking pan...and well...guess what? It stuck. What a pain in the arse to clean!! It had good flavor but I am looking to try a different recipe...anyone have any good one's they can pass on??

#5- Contemplate a new hair cut. UGH!! I got my hair cut a couple weeks ago...and she did such a poor job. I can't stand to look at it. I hate shopping for a new hair dresser. And to think...I paid $$ for the cut and color...(I do like the color...the cut is just awful though!!) :( Poor me!!

#6- Laundry...I know I said this was #1...but guess what?? It has reappeared!!

OK...that's all for now. This list should get me to...oh...about 2pm...and it's almost noon now. Nah...who am I kidding...I can be done in an hour...then I might have a go at list #2!!

Things you don't know about me...

At home today...and not a lot to do...except the endless amount of laundry...but who wants to do that? Not me!!

So here are some ramblings about things you probably don't know about me...

I love cereal. Especially Raisin Bran (there are never enough raisins, so I put in more!!)

I read other people's blogs...except the ones in foreign languages...those I just can't understand!

I love to read books...but if I can't get into it within the first couple of chapters, then I don't finish it.

I like to find mistakes in random writings. The other day, there was a sign at a thrift store and it said Clearence...and I pointed it out to Kent that they spelled it wrong. (Clearance) (Mind you...I am not a perfect speller...but I do know my way around a little bit.)

I love my kids...but they can be frustrating at times.

Just because I get frustrated at them...does not mean I don't love them!!

I am feeling fabulous with this pregnancy!!

I hate the smell of dirt!!

I hate conflict.

I have 2 friends who are trying to get pregnant...and I sincerely hope and pray that it works for them.

I care how other people view me.

I am angry at my dad.

I love my mom.

I get teary sometimes when I think of my mom. *Damn Hormones!!

I secretly hope to be a surrogate again...but I don't know if I will. (guess it's not a secret if I tell people, huh?)

I wish Levi didn't have M.S. but he does and I am so happy that the drugs are working for him.

I don't think that Levi and Liz really know how I feel about them.

*Damn Hormones!!

I think my IP's (Intended Parents) were pretty reserved in the beginning of our journey, but now that we are almost into our 2nd trimester, I feel like they are opening up more...and I appreciate them. I would love to be good friends with them. They are a really great couple.

My husband knows that I love him, but I don't think I tell him often enough. I should work on that.

Same thing with my kids. I am just not a touchy, lovey person and I don't tell them enough that I love them.

I would love a best friend. (Besides my husband.)

I love the spring and fall.

I love flowers...especially in the spring.

I don't watch very much T.V. However, sometimes, I mindlessly watch it.

I love to read the paper from front to back first thing in the morning and hate it when it's not there at 5am!! (6 on weekends!)

I would love a glass of red wine with dinner...(but that will have to wait!!)

I love to get into the hot tub...(but that will have to wait too!!)

I would love to have Lasix on my eyes so I wouldn't have to wear glasses.

I could continue on and on...but I am sure you have seen enough.

Baking a chicken...so I have time!!

To blog...that is!! Whole chickens take forever to bake!!

Have not blogged in a while...it's really been just the same ole, same ole and I don't want anyone to get bored while reading.

However, with that said, we had the first trimester screening (Nuchal Test) done yesterday. This is a blood test (finger prick) and an in depth ultrasound to measure the clear (translucent) space in the tissue at the back of the baby's neck. Babies with abnormalities tend to accumulate more fluid at the back of their neck during the first trimester causing this clear space to be larger than average.

The test will come back in about a weeks time...but from what the Doctor said, we are in good range to not have any abnormalities. So this is a fabulous thing.

I also had a midwife appointment today. I really like her...she seems so at ease with everything. She got the heartbeat on the Doppler for a moment, but then the baby must have moved, so she couldn't pick it up again. But she said it's a nice strong heartbeat...so there are no worries. I go back in a month. I am still spotting here and there but there really isn't too much of a worry about it, unless something changes.

In other news...hmmm...what other news??

We got the girls bunk beds. They needed them so bad, since their room is so small. So, on Saturday, we went bed shopping...and well, kind of shot right through the budget. But we did really good...we not only got the girls their very sturdy bunk beds, we got them shelves (which are cool) and then we got Michael a new desk...and he has one of the twin beds that the girls had...and since his room is small as well, it fits in there so much better than what he had which was a queen...I think!! And finally, Kent and I got ourselves a bed frame with matching night stands. We have been married 10 years, and have never had a matching set...so HOORAY!! It's a dark wood, so we got a chocolate brown duvet to go with it and the lamps that I picked up at Goodwill for only 3 bucks a piece. Not next month, but the month after that, we hope to get a matching dresser...and our room will be complete. YAY!!

OK...must check chicken!! It is smelling so incredible...I wish I could put a scratch and sniff on this blog...then you could smell the aroma as well. YUM!!

I think Surrogacy is AMAZING!!

There are many things in life that I find amazing. Surrogacy is one of them. When I was pregnant with my own children...it's almost like I just went through the actions of carrying them, having them, and raising them. But this time, I think it is very different.

For starters, I KNOW exactly what my body is doing. I never (or possibly didn't care) to know what my body was doing during pregnancy. I knew I was pregnant, and that was it. I mean, I read things, and looked at pictures and such...but this time, it is just so different!!

I am 11 weeks and 1 day pregnant today. WOW!! I know what the baby looks like...and I can feel the ever present changing of my body. I am so excited for my IP's...I can barely stand it!!

We had our first mid-wife appointment yesterday. My IP's and Kent were there. I had a routine below the belt check, to make sure everything felt like it was in the right place. And it was!! She tried to use the Doppler to hear the heartbeat, but Alissa (my mid-wife) couldn't find it...she said it was probably due to my tilted uterus. (I bet you all really wanted to know about that, huh??) We did have another ultrasound...and the baby was measuring 11 weeks 4 days along. You could see this perfectly formed hand...it was awesome!!

The ultrasound person (I am not sure if she was a tech, or a Doctor) anyways...she pinpointed the cause for why I have been spotting. Turns out, from all of the meds coursing through my body, I have a very small fibroid. So it's really nothing to worry about!! WHEW!! I haven't been overly, beyond myself, with worry...sort of like a nagging worry...WHY AM I SPOTTING??? Now I feel like I am on cloud 9...YAY!!

I didn't get to see my IP's for our originally scheduled ultrasound...prior to Christmas. So, it was great seeing them again. And I got to meet their sweet little girl. You should see the eyes on her!! They are going to have to bar the doors once she gets to the dating age!! :) I have not yet met their son (he was at school.) But if he is anything like his sister...he too will knock em dead!! J and T gave me a INCREDIBLE gift box full of bath/beauty items from a place called Lush. I opened it when I got home and just smelled, and smelled and smelled all of the things in there. And the product is so different from anything that I have seen. If you are curious as to what I mean, you can look it up at www.lush.com. Kayte finally had to go get the coffee pot and sniff it since here nose was full of different smells!! :) And all I gave them was a batch of homemade cookies. So much for T's diet!! :)
Well, I am off on a walk today...thanks for sticking with me.

Martha...I could be on your heels!!

The kids finally went back to school today...when the snow started on Sunday evening...I thought for sure we were in for another week of nasty, stay indoors, type weather. Thankfully, when we woke up on Monday morning, the snow was completely gone. The kids didn't have school on Monday since it was a teacher inservice day...so today, it was back to the old grind. WHEW!!

Since I was home alone today, for the first time in a long time...I decided to bake. And believe it or not...I didn't do half bad!!

I started with chocolate chip cookies...I know...I know...it's a pretty easy feat...right? Well, it's been a while since I have made cookies because Ashlyn is always the one in the household to bake. So I researched some recipes for chocolate chip cookies....and went about my task. And oh baby!! They turned out so good. A little crispy on the outside and full of dark chocolate goodness. OH YEAH!!

I then started a batch of homemade meatballs. I actually ground my own meat ( no, I did not raise and slaughter the beef!!) so there wasn't hardly any fat at all. *I bought a HUGE cut of meat from Cash and Carry...and we will have at least 10 meals out of it!! OK...back to the meatballs...I put spinach in them...and baked them and put them with spaghetti...oh goodness...it was delicious!!

After I put the meatballs in the oven to bake, I decided to try my hand at another bread batch. I used a different recipe...and....yup...it worked. The bread turned out pretty heavy...but it had such good flavor. I cut into it while it was still hot and gave some to the kids...oh, they thought they were in heaven!! So, other than the heaviness to the bread and the fact that it took forever to bake, it turned out really good!! I will be interested to see how it tastes tomorrow...maybe I will make the kids sandwiches with it for their lunches.

So that was my baking tryst today. Kent is in Ohio until tomorrow. Last night was the first night that we have spent apart since we moved into this house. I hate it when he is gone...I have the hardest time sleeping. :( And, my coffee just wasn't the same without him here. Oh my...he is just the neatest person that I know...SIGH!!

Tomorrow is Michaels 14th birthday. I am constantly amazed at how fast these kids grow up. He is really coming to be such a fabulous young man. Very witty...he makes us girls laugh...constantly. So, tomorrow...I will be in the kitchen yet again. I am making him pineapple upside cupcakes for him because he loves them so much. And, he wanted mashed potatoes (his favorite) so I will make them homemade and also make homemade meatloaf.

I went for my pre-ob appointment yesterday. I love this clinic that I am going to...they are so nice, and always answer my questions. I am going to have a mid-wife this pregnancy. I am excited about that, as I have always heard great things about mid-wives...but never thought that I would get the chance to be pregnant again. So I will see her for the first time next Monday. YAY!! I will be 11 weeks on Monday...that's only two weeks away from getting into the 2ND trimester!! This baby will be here before we know it!!

OK...off to relax before I go to bed.

Happy New Year!!

And so comes the end of yet another year...I feel like I woke up 2 months ago and it was just June...and now it's the end of 2008!! WOW!!

I think at some point in our lives, we all strive to do something perfectly, the first time you do it. For me, it's all about bread.

My wonderful hubby got me a gorgeous KitchenAid mixer for Christmas. It's all mighty and powerful...and I bow to it...nah...just kidding. IT would like to think it's THAT powerful...but really...it's not. Anyways, I have been reading online about different recipes for bread. I found a really simple recipe...which called for mixing everything together in the kitchenaid bowl...including the yeast and water...pretty much, dump it in...and mix it up. So, that is just what I did. It said to let it mix until the dough seperates from the bowl edge..done...and then put a clean dish cloth over it and let it rise about 25 minutes....done. And it worked!! It rose appropriately, so I then mashed it down, and put it into a greased pan and then put 6 "rolls" into the big muffin tin. Our oven has a proofer on it, so I put the said items in the oven on proof for about 20 minutes...and sure enough...they rose again.

WOW!! I MUST BE A PRO AT BREAD MAKING!!! So I labor on ahead with the next step which is the baking...I simply turned the oven onto 400 and since the goods were already in the oven, I set the timer for 30 minutes and WHAA LAA!!! Bread and Rolls!!

I then take them out of the oven and kind of tap on the top...it's nice and brown...so, it goes tap, tap, tap. Hmmmm....sounds a little crunchy on top, but that's ok. I then take one of the rolls out, and cut into it....OWWW!!!! IT'S DANG HOT!!! Well duh, you DID just pull it out of the oven!! I then take a tiny taste of the roll...ummm...hmmm...

Arn't they SUPPOSED to have SOME KIND OF FLAVOR?? Like the yummy yeast flavor or shouldn't they taste bready or something??? These are SOOOOO bland....UGH!!! These are DEFINATELY NOT a yummy dinner roll. In fact, if we still had snow, I would make the suggestion to the kids that they could go play hockey with these rolls.

Well, what can I say?? Martha Stewart I am NOT!! Back to the drawing board...

Happy New Year everyone!!! Hugs, Andrea

Let it snow..let it snow..let it...NO!! NO MORE SNOW!!!

How many people wish for a white Christmas?? I know I have...and you can bet I won't ever be wishing for a white Christmas again!! As I write...it is snowing..yet again!! Don't get me wrong...it really IS beautiful....until you have to either be out in it...or you can't go anywhere because of it!! And, they are calling for another 1-3" for tomorrow. ENOUGH ALREADY is the sentiment I am giving!!

I was supposed to have my 8 week ultrasound on Monday...but due to the snow, they closed the OHSU clinic for the day. So, I called and left a message on Tuesday that I needed to have an appointment on Friday for an U/S and a Rhogham shot.

Let me back up here a moment...Sunday evening, I was sitting on the bed, using my computer...when all of the sudden, I felt a "gush" down in the nether regions. I thought to myself..."OH CRAP!!" So, I went potty, and sure enough...blood. :( I tried not to panic, but it's easier said than done when you are 8 weeks pregnant!! I called Kent upstairs, and he also told me to relax...so, I tried. We then went back to the bed, and we prayed for this little baby. I then took it easy the rest of the night...only getting up to go potty and brush my teeth and get my jammas on.

Fast forward to Monday morning...I called the Dr. and they said to just bedrest until the bleeding stopped and that because the clinic was closed, then to get in there on Friday for the u/s. I also was supposed to stop one of the injections as of Sunday, but they said to keep on it for now (which I am ok with doing...what's a few more weeks of shots in your bum??)

So, I spent Monday and half of Tuesday in bed...Kent and Kayte have been so sweet...bringing up my meals so nicely prepared. Kayte made me some top ramen yesterday...and she was so cute bringing it up...she cooked it...and she says..."Mom, I hope it's not too overdone!!" (She knows I don't like soggy noodles.) Well, it wasn't cooked all the way...but I didn't say that...I just ate it happily. She had also brought some cottage cheese and a glass of ice water with a straw. AWWW!!!

So, the OHSU clinic finally calls me back...and she tells me that as of the 17th, they can no longer do obstetrical u/s on IVF patients that are not their own. UMM...WHAT?? So, you are telling me, if I would have gone in on Monday (if the weather would not have been so bad) you would have sent me home? "Yup, that's what we are telling you." GRRR!!! So now I am left with...bleeding...wondering what's up with this little tater tot...and NO ultrasound!! GREAT!!!

I called my case manager and the Dr.s office...My case manager called around to a few places and got a u/s at an imaging center. While she was calling around, I got a call back from a dr's office right up the street from me, because I will have to start being seen by a regular OB in the next few weeks. So, as we were talking, I told her that I needed a Rhogham shot (because of the bleed) and she said a nurse would call me back to schedule it. Well, long and short of it...

I walked up to the Dr's office, and had the rhogham shot AND a ultrasound!! How cool is that?? And, they were supposed to close at 3 pm because of the weather, and they stayed open...I want to say just for me...but maybe not...I felt like they did though.

And good news!! We saw the baby!! It was measuring 8 weeks 3 days and had a heart rate of 183 BPM!! They could not find the source of the bleed...and I am still bleeding...I think when I do anything physical (the walk in the snow, up the hill) then I tend to bleed more. The Dr. called it a threatened miscarriage...he said 1 in 4 women have them...He said if I am going to miscarry, then I will and there is nothing to be done about it. (He did say except hope and pray!!) So, as long as I am bleeding...I will continue to be on bedrest....(which sucks, but it's OK...I know I am doing the right thing!!)

So that's it for now...I wish you all a Merry Christmas and the Happiest of a New Year!!

Fears...

Sorry I have not updated this blog sooner. I am sure you all are on pins and needles wanting to know the outcome of the first sonogram. Well, we have been blessed with one little sac and one little hearbeat. The heartbeat was so small, the Dr. could not count it. But, it was there...and that's what I wanted to see. Whew!! My IP's were there to see it as well...and I am so thankful that they were able to be there to see it. YAY!!

We will go back on December 22nd for the 8 week ultrasound. That is only a week away....

So, here is why I titled this blog today, the way I did.

I am scared! Plain and simple! I am scared of something happening to this baby. I hear stories of how some surrogates go in for their such and such ultrasound, and the Dr. tells them that the baby stopped growing at such and such a week. And then it is over for them. I am scared that it will happen to me...no matter how much I pray that it won't. You all have to understand that it's just me...having to worry over anything and everything!! What kind of person would I be if I didn't worry?? In the words of Mr. Owl...the world may never know!!

I want everything to be perfect in this pregnancy....I want statistics on the hows and whys women lose babies via IVF. Or why any women lose babies for any reason at all. I want facts...but...all I have to go on are wives tales and stories and my own fears.

I KNOW that this is not in my hands...and it hasn't been in my hands since we started this journey. My IP's have put their complete trust in me...and I don't want to let them down. I never had to worry when I was pregnant with my own kids. I don't think I worried once...I was pregnant...and that was that. And most times during my pregnancy...it was always...I am 2 months pregnant...or 4 months or some other number like that. Never was it...I am 6 weeks and 1 day pregnant. I feel like I have never known my body so well as I do now!!

Someone told me that this is a rollercoaster of uncertainty...and boy...do I believe her!! I want to get in...buckle up...and be able to hold on for the entire ride...and try not to worry that the seat that I am riding in will come off it's tracks...but I do...everyday. SIGH!!

OK...enough of my ramblings for now....you may exit the roller coaster to the right...and thank you for riding the Andrea Fear Train!! :)

Lost in thought...

Sometimes...I just get lost in thoughts...any random thoughts.

I won't bore you with my ramblings though.

Kent and I went to the Inspirators Dinner last night. Inspirators is a non-profit group of people made up of suppliers, vendors, and retailers in the Portland area. The dinner was wonderful...as were the Oroweat people we sat with. Kent and I danced a few dances...however, I was plumb tired...so he danced with a few gals...Kent is such a good dancer!!

Kayte stayed the night with a friend...and went up to Washington with them to get their Christmas Tree. They took a train to get it...which is something I have never heard of. It sounded like she had some great fun...and she really didn't want to come home...hence...the not answering her cell-phone!! :)

Levi and Eva got married on Thursday at the Oregon Garden. They are now spending 10 days with their best friend Mickey Mouse in Disney World!! Eva texted me last night about 7pm and said that they had made it. YAY!! The wedding was really nice...Levi's wedding vows brought me to tears...as they really were a reflection of him. During their first dance, the song was interrupted by Levi and Eva talking about how they met...and what drew them together...and how Levi asked Eva to marry her. It was very sweet...again...it brought me to tears. DAMN Hormones anyway!!

Well...on the surrogacy front, I go in for the 6 week ultrasound on Monday to see how the baby (or babies) are growing. I think there is one in there...Kent and the kids insist that there are 2!! I think the Intended Parents will be there, but I am not sure. Kent cannot come since he will be on the corporate jet flying to Medford for store tours. I felt a little nauseous a couple times last week, but that went away. I would almost rather be nauseous all the time so I know the little one is brewing in there...but...I suppose if I am not sick...that would be a change from my other pregnancies. I was usually sick the first 3 months or so with the other kids...nothing horrid by any means...and certain smells really made me nauseous. Like coffee...ACK!! Kent had to have coffee at work when I was pregnant with Kayte because I couldn't handle the smell. This time...I still feel like I have a super smeller. I don't like the smell of dirt to begin with...and wow...I feel like when I step outside our house, the smell of dirt is so intense...UGH!!!

Well...we are off to get a Christmas tree....

I shall keep you with bated breath until tomorrow...when I reveal the findings of the ultrasound. :)